Somewhere Only We Know

    This week has been one of the most life altering weeks ever! If you think that last week's blog was wild...you got another thing comin'. I didn't workout all week. Lazy about my eating habits, but let me explain. My emotional and spiritual world were in such shambles that the rest had to sit on the back burner for a little bit until all was resolved. I just spent the past week fighting for my life against the Enemy. I had a warning dream nights prior to the week about the Enemy trying to divide and conquer the relationships I have with my brothers and sisters. One brother and sister in particular. As the darkness tried to consume my mind and cause my face to become blank, The Lord with His strong arm pulled me out and told me that this war isn't over! If it was over then the Enemy has won, and that is so not the case. We win, not him! So, as I continued down the path that is narrow and steep and hard, The Lord was with me and knew EXACTLY what He was doing and what was going to happen. I had to humble myself beneath the radiance of God to understand how wrong and selfish I was in order to reconcile the division that was beginning to take place, but NONE of us were having it! I am sleepy, and my day hasn't ended yet and won't until about 1am tonight, but the lack of sleep I had last night was well worth it. The enemy HAS been defeated and the bonds of family have grown stronger than ever before. Thank you, Lord! This morning my heart was filled with Shalom and rest. Relief followed me today, like Psalms 23. It was beautiful. The song by Keane that I mentioned in the title was the song of His heart to mine and repeated it back from my heart to His. Just to take a minute and go somewhere only me and my Beloved knew. Starting next week, my routine will go right back to where it belongs, and my writing will be more about the fitness as intended, however the beautiful thing about our God is that physical fitness is not the only type of healing He wants for me. Blessings.

                                                  --Chasidy

A Week to Remember

    This post is going to be a little bit different. It has to do with weight loss, but has nothing to do with diet, exercise, or any kind of procedure done. This has to do with my heart and the weights lifted off her.
    Long before I decided to start this Journey again to eat well and exercise this fat off my body, the Lord told me that he wanted to fix some things in my heart before I could understand the power I would come to know through getting healthy. The only way I can describe to you the week long break I had from school is majestic. I spent every night last week with the people that I now call family and that I love so very dearly! The experiences and emotions of happiness that I had can only be compare to those you would feel at youth camp, your honeymoon, or maybe even the first time you felt the tangible love of Jesus. I will never be the same again. Derek Sewell, Kristyn Cowan, Lashelle Forsgren, Alyssa Roades, Cynthia Zrna, Matthew Watabe, Ryan Maldanado, and Kara Bulgerin, THANK YOU. You are the most wonderful friends. The Lord knows me and you so well that He would bring us together as a family. The hurt that was in my heart; not believing I was lovely has been completely demolished because of your love for the Lord and your love for me. A stirring in my heart of a new radical love for one another has begun. Living and loving radically. Preferring one another over ourselves. I would take a bullet for each of you in the same day. I know our houses in Heaven will be on the same street and cul-de-sac. To Brad and Silvia Braddy, mom and dad, our Journey has just begun, and I can't wait to see what the Lord is going to do.
    I will try and attempt to write another one tonight about the Journey in fitness, but know that this week of healing is just as much apart of my health and fitness as are the salads. Blessings.


                                                --Chasidy

Brennan said knock you out!

    Like Ice Cube use to say...Today was a good day. And it really was. I ate well and had an awesome workout. It felt so natural for me to do as awesome I did today. Easy lunch, hard, but rewarding workout, and stayed away from sweets! That's great in itself! My friend, one of the personal trainers I work with, had been speaking to me periodically about him helping me lose weight after I had approached him about weeks prior. Well, today was finally that first day of help. From now on, I will refer to him as My Coach. He did such a great job encouraging me to go faster and longer. It was not easy working out with him, but it was well worth it. I got to do strength training that I have been longing to do ever since I started the workouts. He has changed up my routine, and I am completely happy with that. After  the exhausting workout of crunches, chest presses, and meetings with an elliptical, my coach decided that it was time for boxing. Boxing? Seemed fun, but just not at that moment. Maybe next time. It was so hard! It took every bit of strength I had left out of my body. Power punches felt more like arm stretching after about 15 blows to the red padding because I felt so weak after. After we were done, I felt really good, like after every workout. Took a shower and thought, these clothes won't fit pretty soon, they just might fall off. I was suppose to soak in hot water and epsom salt tonight...didn't do it. Oops! Hopefully I won't be too soar tomorrow. Blessings!

                                                            --Chasidy

It's a Hard Knock Week for Us

      So, it's been a week since I last wrote something down. See, what had happened was...I'm just kidding. Just FYI, I am only doing the strict stuff during my work week, including blogging, unless it's absolutely necessary for me to do it. Now, I don't mean eating Jack in the Crack, but maybe a little this or that..like bread. Nothing crazy though...I can hear my Brother now. It has been a rough six days for me, as far as my eating habits go. You thought it was something else, huh? No, nothing crazy, just having trouble pushing through the one addiction my health faces; sweet and fast cooking. I didn't prep for this new work week and I have been randomly eating sweets. When a fruit isn't immediately near, I freak out when I have a sweet craving. Breakfast tomorrow will be a new start to my eating journey. As Jillian Michaels saying, it's not a day by day, it's meal by meal. Despite that negative part of my Journey, my workouts have been awesome! I can already see an improvement in my stability and stamina. I can go longer, not much longer, but nevertheless longer. I see more sweat and burst out more groans of pain with my press onward attitude. I have been so blessed with the resources I have. My God is so good to me. Free this and free that. He really wants me to be successful. I think the stress of finals week is what got me so down, and crazy minded. The next week is break and hopefully, my mind can come back into a place of more rest and focus. I haven't been sleeping much this week, so I will get to catch up on that, too. Speaking of sleep, I think I will start catching up right now. Blessings.

                                                 --Chasidy

Reprogramming

This whole process has not been easy. I have been working hard to better myself. Tonight, I have been thinking alot about reprogramming, like how you reprogram a computer to do what you want it to. Or like the more spiritual way of putting it, renewing your mind. I really wish I could just slip a disk into my head and change it into the elite runner who eats healthy, tasty food like I want to be right now, but God works in a different way. Even though, I don't see the full picture of what I will learn from the experience and timing of the Journey, God does. I have to trust that He knows what he is doing, even when I make a mistake, knowingly. He will turn every effort, every emotion, every mistake, every trial, joy, and tear into good for His glory and my improvement. I did feel a little alone today. I know that I never really am alone because Yeshua is there, but earlier today, I felt alone in this Journey. The hardship of reprogramming myself to eat right is the hardest thing. But, I know I can do it. I know He can do it. I know that together, I can accomplish anything that I want to because He is simply greater than I am. No matter the size of this broken road, the Journey will have a destination. Blessings.

                                                          --Chasidy

Feel the Burn...Twice

      Today, was a good day. I ate a healthy lunch (miss on taste factor), good fruity snack, nap, then great (HIT) dinner..so awesome. My workout today was good. I was a little anxious and worried, but I had to tell myself, "no, let's do this!" Weird treadmill turned me over to the elliptical. Kick my TUSH! and hard! I only did 15 minutes, but it just kicked me. I like it. I liked it ALOT! It was hard, a battle, sweat dripping off my nose. I haven't felt this kind of intensity in over a year. My brother would be proud. I was imagining him standing beside me and the machine, cheering me on with his big grin on his face full of joy, pride, and support. Every time I tried to stop, I had to reject it. All of my co-workers were cheering me on and saying how proud they were of my efforts. All eyes were on me, but my eyes were on God; helping me push through my mind thinking that pain is forever. NO! Pain is temporary and in the end well worth! I got down of the machine, with wiggly legs, with the biggest feeling of accomplishment. I enjoyed that feeling. I want that feeling again. God is Good! If that wasn't a good ending to a day, then I have a better one. After the awesome R.are women's meeting in the cafe, I met up with some of the most awesome people I have ever met in my life to spike it up in some volleyball in the sand. The best friends a girl could ever want. After THREE AND A HALF hours of playing..with maybe a five minute break, I was sweaty,tired, and "sandy". Once again the feeling of accomplishment hit me on the way home. Today, I learned that in the mist of sweat, tears, and even sand all over you, the blissfulness knowing that you have pushed yourself beyond what you could normally do is a blessing in itself. Blessings.

                                                                --Chasidy

Not What I Expected

When I woke up this morning, I was ready and excited to start the day. I had it all figured out; this health and fitness thing. I was so wrong. Lunch went well, but I think it all start with just a tiny bit of light mayo. I knew that I probably shouldn't put it in my tuna salad, but it was VERY little to begin with. The rest of the day went down hill from there. I forgot my weight lifting gloves, so I had to settle for cardio (stair climbing from one building to another at work and again at home a couple of times). I overslept in my afternoon nap, therefore I couldn't prepare myself dinner. THEN I was late to class, and had to decide during the break if I should eat at home late, eat now with crappy food, or not eat at all! I didn't know what to do! I decided to eat then and shamefully eat crappy food. After class, I had the worse case of chocolate withdrawal and I had a 170 calorie chocolate bar. I was so disappointed in how my day ended and the decisions I had made. I really thought that this was going to be easier since I had done this a year ago for a few months This is not what I expected. At all! Thankfully, I have a God that is much bigger than I am, and had to humble me a little today. Tomorrow IS a new day, and I am NOT done, and I will NOT give up. I know that God has something better for me, and I want that better for myself. Blessings.

                                                  --Chasidy

First Things First

     Hello! Thank you for taking the time to read my first blog. I thought maybe it would be easier to journal my weight loss journey electronically instead of paper, especially since I am on it more often than I use to due to school work. 

    First things first, I thought I should write a little bit about my first steps on this Journey. I have been overweight since about the first grade, I was very active in sports and girl scouts all through elementary and part of junior high. The state I was in as of 2009,  I wasn't active, didn't eat right, and slowly losing my battle to obesity. Throughout the years I had tried to do something, but I was too afraid of failure. A good friend of mine, Jon, whom I will refer to as my brother; spiritual, not biological, finally got me off my feet, into the gym, and eating correctly. God, I love that man! After a devastating lay-off at work, I left betrayed my God, and didn't want anything to do with Him. It was because of that lay off that I couldn't continue my fitness.  I felt as if I was unimportant, bottom of the barrel, and just a failure at being the person I wanted to be. So, I left Him, He never left me, but I ignored Him. After several months of yelling, crying, talking, job-hunting and job-leaving, pouring out my heart, and learning that I had TONS of self-hatred, low self-esteem, and lack of trust in God, I turned back to the Father that loves me and truly cares for me more than I could ever know. I know now that the process I was going through (and still am, hence the blog), was so that He could show me the roots of why I thought so poorly of myself and judged myself so severely. He then removed them, completely. When the time came for me to get back into a healthy lifestyle physically, I was ready and eager!

    Today was the first day. I had prepared meals for my first week, by myself. I packed my lunch and gym bag by myself. I workout for the first time in over a year by myself. I didn't have my brother around this time, but I did have my Daddy. The whole way. I enjoyed my eating today. I enjoyed the pushing myself to finish five more minutes of walking and the feeling of accomplishment after. And in the morning, I am going to enjoy the soarness and doing it all over again. Glory be to Daddy! Sorry for such a long blog, but tomorrow will be shorter considering I would have already told you my beginning steps on this great Journey. Thanks again, blessings. 

                                                               --Chasidy